GIRL 56
KID VOICE GIRL
Her picture was ugly.
Her writeup was boring.
She wanted a date.
On the phone, she sounded like an 8 year old.
I met her in Princeton for an ice cream cone at the Halo Pub.
I showed up an hour late, on purpose. I scoped her out from across the street while I lit a cigar.
She was a short-haired hag and much older than she'd looked in the picture.
I could have flaked (disappeared).
I decided to wade in. I had an hour until sunset, when the next date was scheduled to start.
I shook her hand. It was limp and cold.
We talked. Her spirit was limp and cold.
I looked at her. Kid Voice Girl, I said, I'm not for you and you're not for me.
She freaked out. What? How could you be like that? How could you be so mean?
I stood up. I guess I'll stop torturing you, I said.
I walked away.
Yikes. I should have just stood her up.
Lesson learned.
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